We have had a really hard past 9 days. I had no clue that Tyler going to kindergarten would be this difficult. I read something today in my magazine that people tend to remember the good things when they read/hear about good things first and then the bad, which doesn't make sense to me but i am going to try it so i don't feel like a failure and so that people in internet land will remember the good and not the bad about this blog:
Good:
-Ty started kindergarten!! I am excited for him to go to school, learn, do homework, read, make new friends, etc. It is an exciting (and scary/sad) part of being a parent, getting to see your kid grow up.
- I get to pick ty up from school everyday! i think that has been my longest goal as a parent to be able to pick him up from school, i feel like i have more time and more input in his learning, by getting to talk to him about his day immediately and then coming home and helping with homework. i just feel more involved, so i am grateful i am lucky enough to do that.
- Ty actually got the teacher i wanted him to get, which is awesome, I'm sure the other teachers are great but this one fits ty and his needs.
- (I really wish I could think of more positive things but I can't this sucks..)
Not so good:
-I guess the hardest thing this week is that Tyler is having a lot of problems adjusting. On tue, wed, thur, & fri. Tyler had an 'accident', not at school but at home. Tyler was pretty good at potty training and in the last year he has only had about 3 'accidents' but last week he had 4 in a row (and one about 5 min, ago)! Then he also started to have some behavior issues, not listening, being more immature (i know he is five but that's the only word i can think of), and in general not behaving. I'm not saying that he is an angel all of the time but he has never acted like this before. He has gotten in trouble several times at school already and has been one step away from the principles office and this type of behavior is not like him at all. Yesterday i had a melt down because i was so dumbfounded about his behavior, i mean i am obviously doing something wrong. I feel like i have failed or something. I am trying to be rational and i have a couple rational thoughts about why this may be happening. 1.maybe it's just purely regression and that it is just a phase. It's really common for these things to happen when there is a major change in the childs life (like starting school). 2.James and my parenting styles are not in sync and maybe the inconsistencies cause him to test things at school. But no matter how much i think about it i just come back to "i suck as a mom."
-When i dropped Ty off on his 1st day i cried. Its really important to not cry in front of you kid otherwise they might get stressed out and i prepared for this for almost a month telling myself that i would be strong so Ty could be strong. And i did really really good until the teachers said we couldn't come in the class and had to say bye outside. I was depending on coming in the classroom to say good bye and when they said we couldn't i couldn't hold it in anymore and started crying. I felt like an idiot, but i kept telling ty that i was crying because i was happy and i think it was ok.
- We got a note today saying that the classrooms are too full and that they hired another teacher and Tyler is going to be moved to another class. So now we have to start all over next week with a new teacher and I hope Tyler will be ok with it.
Everything is just really stressful right now and hard.
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